Sunday, July 24, 2011

My Heart is Broken!!!!

Hi everyone! I know it's been a while since I posted, and I have missed blogging terribly.  I've been working a lot of over time and by the time I get home, I just can't find it in me to blog.  This post isn't a very happy one.  I have some sad news.  My precious Maggie had to have eye surgery Friday to remove her left eye.  This has left my heart broken!

This picture was taken 1 week ago from Friday when I took Maggie to see her vet because her eye had turned a hazy blue color.  I thought she was just going blind in that eye, so I hadn't prepared myself for anything worse.  When I called to check on her last Friday Dr. Mattie suggested that I take her to a place in Cordova called Advanced Animal Eye Care.  That's an hour away from where we live, but that didn't matter to us!  Dr. Mattie said she thought she might have glaucoma and that she had a small ulcer on her eye also.  That Friday I called and made Maggie an appointment for this past Wednesday to have her eye looked at.  I couldn't get off work to take her on Monday, so I had to wait until Wednesday.  If I had of known then what was really going on, I would have called in sick on Monday and taken Maggie there right away.

After 4 days from Friday, this is what her eye looked like on Wednesday, when we took her to the specialist.  The ulcer had grown tremendously.  I could tell it was really hurting her, and I felt so bad for her.  Anyway, Dr. Miller (the specialist) said she had a descemetocele ulcer.  He said these are normally caused from an injury to the eye.  For the life of me I can't figure out what Maggie could have done to her eye.  Dr. Miller did say that he thought he could repair the eye, but that he could get in there and end up having to take the eye out if the ulcer had gotten too deep.  I asked how much this would cost and honestly about passed out.  The cost for her surgery would be $1500.  I knew at that moment that I was going to be failing Maggie as a mom, because there was no way that I could afford to save her eye.  Dr. Miller was even going to charge $1200 just to remove her eye.  I had no idea what we were going to do.  I called my vet back home and she said that she could remove the eye for $150.  I knew that was the only route we could go.  I was sooo sick to my stomach because I was failing Maggie!

Below is what Maggie's eye looked like Friday morning before I took her to the vet.  I can only imagine how much pain she was in.  I held it together pretty well until I took her inside to drop her off for surgery.  I totally lost it at the moment.  Everyone at the clinic assured me that Maggie would be just fine.  I knew I had to have faith and stay strong.  Of course I totally lost when I got to work too.   Most people don't understand how a person can get so upset over something like this.  They say she's only a dog.  Maggie is more than a dog for me, and I know most of you can relate.  She is our daughter.  I've had her for 13 years, and she has brought me through some very tough times.  Anyway, later in the morning I called to check on her and she had made it through surgery just fine.

I tried to prepare myself for how she would look, and it didn't look as bad as what I thought.   I brought her home Friday evening and she seemed to be doing pretty well.   Yesterday was a different story.  I had to work, so I wasn't able to be home with her.  Thank God that Tony was able to stay home with her.  She seemed to be in a lot of pain yesterday, so Dr. Mattie met Tony at the clinic and gave Maggie a shot for pain.  Her eye was swollen pretty bad, so she gave her an antibiotic shot also and sent some antibiotics home with her.  She also called in a prescription for pain meds. Here's Maggie on Friday after I got her home.  I have cried and cried for her.  I know she doesn't understand what's going on.

As most of you know Maggie is handicapped already due to her back, so she is having a very hard time adjusting.   She doesn't want us to get out of her sight.  If we leave the room, she just cries and cries.  I just don't know what to do for her.  We take her out and she won't even try to use the bath room...she just sits in the yard and cries.  All I can say is that my heart is broken!  I want to make her feel better and for her to know that everything will be okay.  I honestly think she is scared.  Does that make sense?  I know there are some dog experts out there, so does anyone have any advise as to what I can do to help her through this?  I can't get her to eat today either, therefore she's not getting her meds.  I have her on the couch with me as I type this, and this seems to be the first time that she has rested since Friday night.

Sorry for such a downer post, but you all know Maggie, and I wanted to share with you what's going on with her.  Please send some prayers and love her way for her to get better soon.



  1. I am so sorry that you, Maggie, and your family have to go through all of this. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you and much love to Maggie.

  2. poor sweet maggie. :( i hope she feels safe, happy and healthy again very soon.

    there are many one eyed cats at the special needs cat sanctuary that i volunteer with that do perfectly fine with the one eye, they dont even seem to notice it, but im not sure how long the adjustment takes after the surgery.

    the combination of coming out of the anesthesia, the soreness that surgeries cause, and the meds she is on now is probably making her feel bad and she doesnt understand it :( with lots of love and comfort, i would think she would start to perk up in a few days. maybe you can make her something special to eat? and give her lots and lots of extra love and attention. i wonder if one of the natural herbal remedies for pets would help her feel calm and relaxed again after she is done with her meds.

    get well soon sweet maggie! <3

  3. Your story broke my heart! Not that Maggie will not begin adjusting and feel better eventually, but I can completely understand why you'd be so distraught about the surgery. I've also met a cat with one eye, and he seemed happy and healthy. The only advise I can offer is that sometimes when a pet owner comforts the dog too much, the dog starts to feel more insecure. The dog feels there is reason to panic if their owner is overly concerned. So, acting happy when comforting her may help with her anxiety. I learned that trick on the Dog Whisperer! Good luck!

  4. Aw, Michelle, I'm so sorry that this has happened and I can just imagine how heartbroken you are. Kelly also went through this with one of her dogs somewhat recently-

    Maggie probably is scared right now, and if she's in pain I'm sure that doesn't help. Dogs normally don't eat when they're stressed or healing, so don't be too concerned about that. Just as long as she's drinking enough water. Like Jesse said, stay calm around her. Comfort her & soothe her and make everything as routine as possible.

    Most of all, keep reminding yourself that you all will get through this. I know how horrendous it is right now, but it will pass. Like with her back, Maggie will adjust. She has your & Tony's love, which is the best medicine there is. <3

    Lots & lots of love and hugs to you all!! xoxo

  5. Oh Michelle,

    I'm so sorry to hear about Maggie's eye. I understand completely how heartbreaking this is. I've seen many dogs and cats with one eye though, and it seems like they had adjusted to it...I'm sure it takes some time. My heart goes out to all of you. And, one-eye or no, Maggie has the best thing she could ask for--people in her life who love her very much.

  6. Oh my . My heart is broken as well, poor baby. I would feel the exact same way that you do. I am praying for you and praying for your sweet Maggie.

  7. Rose said exactly what I was going to. I'm just relieved she's still alive! These types of post titles really scare me. Lots of people do just fine with one eye, i.e., Sammy Davis Jr, Peter Falk, Sandy Duncan etc. so be strong or Maggie might pick up your anxiety.

  8. I was really scared when I read your post title, too! I'm relieved she is going to be okay, and I understand every second of sadness and worry you have been experiencing. Prayers that she will be back to her old self very soon and that her Momma will feel assured.

  9. Oh Maggie! Poor pupper must be wondering what on earth is going on! She is SO SUPER STRONG though from what i've learned about your adorable pup already and I know she'll start feeling and acting like her self before you know it!!! She can hang out with my deaf little Roxy and they can help each other function =) I'm always here if you need to talk! love you!

  10. Michelle, I'm really sorry to hear about poor Maggie - for her sake and yours. I'm sure it will take adjusting for everyone but it will get better. You and Maggie and Tony will all take care of each other. She's blessed to have you two.

  11. Keep strong, Maggie will feel your strength and love, and recover.

    XXX to both

  12. Michelle, I am so sorry to hear about Maggie and hope for a very quick recovery. I just can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. But pets are just like our children as you said and they are family so matter what others may think. Just know you have a whole world of bloggers praying for you all and Maggie. Sending virtual hugs your way!

  13. Hi Michelle, I hope Maggie is doing better. Once she heals and sees you reassuring her and taking care of her, I bet she will do just fine. We had a cat and had to get his eye removed, and once he adjusted he did just great for many more years.

    Maggie is lucky you take such good care of her. Take care.